about the last post, yeah, sorry about that.... you see, the depression comes in waves, and i wrote that while having a minurature panic attack, really, i didnt have much reason to... i dont know why i flipped out so much, i think it was because i hadnt taken my 'happy pill' or anti anxiety meds... i blame that, sry about my momentary lapse of insanity, it just happens sometimes.... but in the time i havent been on, i've been writing alot, alot alot, and though i decided to stop my progress with the riley book, while at UBH they gave me the idea to write a short story about it, or rather had me write a short story about my life, so i'm going to write a book about, well me. it might be a little werd, but i'm excited, i havent gotten far at all, but while in UBH i wrote this poem-
People stripped of prejuduce,
and blind to not accept,
thats what i've found here,
within these walls,
i have no fear,
not scared to speak up,
i say what i feel,
and they all listen,
they all help me heal,
we are so different,
yet each understand,
sharing our stories,
they all grabbed my hand,
leading me to light,
we found our separate ways,
hand in hand,
day by day,
now that i'm better,
i'm ready to leave,
i'll never forget you,
but my pain is relieved.
i actually memorized that poem...
i wrote this one two days after i got out :(
slowly i'm fading,
better at last,
and now i'm going back,
slowly days pass,
sadder within hours,
of leaving those walls,
that building standing safe,
it beckons and calls,
i yearn to go back,
to be safe once more,
but i must not give in,
but this pain i can't ignore,
standing on my own,
is harder than i planned,
but i have helpfull people,
that lend me their hands,
whenever i need them,
they stand by my side,
the terrible fact is,
that i almost died,
now that i realize
i have some meaning,
i find i like life,
and this state of being.
and then some other work...
a secret love of life can pass,
in the darkest of your days,
a sweet loving sound does last,
though a terrible haze,
keeping you alive,
even when its hard,
giving off short highs,
but leaving you scarred,
but you realize its worth it,
to live through bursts of hell,
even when its hard,
try to live to tell,
make the happiness last,
no matter how small,
because it really matters,
when sadness calls,
luring you in,
swallowing you whole,
killing your heart,
and stealing your soul,
don't let it take you,
keep it at arms length,
close enough to feel,
but far enough to heal.
just to tell you, i was so freaked last night i never slept, so i wrote four poems, here they are-
I just give up,
you should know,
i'm so pissed off,
from head to toe,
don't you care?
even in the least?
or am i nothing?
you selfish beast,
you said 'I love you,'
then changed your mind,
but i had fallen,
in little time,
but you just end it,
its no big deal,
your over me,
you're heart has healed,
what am i?
some stupid bitch?
that you forgot,
on your map,
a tiny dot,
a point in your life,
thats meaningless now,
no feeling for me,
i don't know how,
but should i care?
i think not?
but on my map,
your to big a dot,
you matter to much to me,
you touched my heart,
but with that touch,
it broke apart.
and the 2nd
though i'm exauhsted,
i can't ever sleep,
these thoughts of you,
just make me weep,
you hurt me so bad,
you can't even comprehend,
these thoughts you left me,
my heart can't mend,
not with this pain,
thats always around,
a constant beating,
i don't make a sound,
i never scream out,
not until now,
so i laugh at your face,
you fat bastard cow,
how could you hurt me?
in that way you did?
you scarred my life,
its something i hid,
but now that its out,
itsmy turn to haunt you,
i want revenge,
for the things that you do,
what number was i?
in your list of victims,
no special person,
just some girl,
another one to hurt,
you have a long list?
let me read it,
now eat my fist.
i'm leaving for the weekend, typre the rest later, bye
Friday, December 12, 2008
An Explanation
Posted by lone poet at 4:46 PM
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14 comments:
ummm.... I hope you feel better soon. I can totally relate to your last poem. Take care Taylor.
I've tagged you!
Rules:
1.Each blogger must post these rules first.
2.Each blogger starts with 8 random facts/habits about themselves.
3.Blogger that are tagged need to write on their own blog about their 8 things.
4.At the end of your blog,you need to choose 8 people to get tagged and list their names.
5.Don't forget to leave them a comment,telling them that they've been tagged and to read your blog.
Tay! I love ya! You're awesome! I miss you sooooo much!
~Kourt
thats a lot of poems. i dont think i even have the brain capacity dd write four.
and read the title of the post. it should naturally give it away.
clue;
reh dee ohh edd
krl
woah. im sure your hand hurts
krl
Hi!
Merry Christmas!
Have A Great Time :)
thats cute. wee what if like, the world was coming to an end and your problems or anyones for that matter, didn't matter! woah blew my own mind!
hello?
thank you. because victoria said im a 'child prodigy' because im amazing at so much stuff so she wanted to see my drawings.
and she thought those were amazing too. typical...
she just wont stop.
krl
haha thanks :)
omg it seems like its been forever since i commented on ur blog :P
haha ur so weird :)
grrrawr. :P
hey. You already know who it is. We're those things about me? I'm sorry if I got u in trouble with your parents. And if they're about me, I still think about you, don't think I don't. But our paths are paths that aren't supposed to crossed. We tried and failed. We weren't even supposed to be talking because it was a secret. Sorry. (:P)* This is proof that it's ME. U Know Who.
OMG. Yea i get depression and anxiety too. I'm so sorry. I know how bad it sucks :^(
OMG. Yea i get depression and anxiety too. I'm so sorry. I know how bad it sucks :^(
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